It made me sad to watch these people... and I realized that I'd have to pay them to help me.
I immediately ran over to a nearby trash can, and removed the bag so that I could use it for water, but naturally the damn thing was fastened down... and I couldn't break the chain. So, I then ran to a nearby business and asked them to borrow a garbage can. It turned out to be some gymnasium that I went to like fifteen years ago. Anyhow, I then ran back to get water that I could dump on the dry brush that was causing the fire to spread. Luckily, the fire department actually arrived quickly and took care of business. I returned the bucket, and left... walking away from the ever-growing crowd of people who simply sat and watched the fire burn. At times, I feel like the only person who even gives a shit when something bad happens to someone I don't know. I'm sick of both literally and figuratively putting out fires, because no one else cares but me.
I tried calling a ton of people today, many for the second or third time in a short while. I just kept calling person after person, but no one answered their phone or called back after I left yet another voice mail... not one person, of every single local and long distance call I made. None of the people I text messaged replied, either. This has been happening for days, along with the people who say they'll call me back and don't... and I wish I understood why. Am I doing something wrong? I can't remember the last time I felt so... alone. I guess I'll go into San Francisco to do some convention work now, and leave you guys to your lives. I hope that all of you are well, since I can't seem to get in touch with any of you. I do miss you and love you all, though. I don't know why I feel so sad right now. I'm about to cry, and it doesn't make any sense.
I feel like such a pansy right now... and I'm sorry for whining about this. I know all of you have your own problems to deal with, most of them much more important and more significant than this stupid one of mine...
- Chris (cK1)